Shavdidkem is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, self-confident zebra.

Shavdidkem created the planet Saturn eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Shavdidkem, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Shavdidkem, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Shavdidkem's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Shavdidkem's Holy Commandments

1. Erect three carbon sculptures of Shavdidkem on top of important buildings.

2. Do not sit in public.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Shavdidkem must be the most important thing in your life.