Lanrulcib is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, unfair frog.

Lanrulcib created dark matter two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Lanrulcib, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Lanrulcib, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Lanrulcib's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Lanrulcib's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

2. Do not trade with those who eat corn.

3. Dolphins are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Never wear gray hats.