Dutbenjat is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, merciful chicken.

Dutbenjat created everything that exists nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dutbenjat, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Dutbenjat, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Dutbenjat's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Dutbenjat's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

2. Do not drink water in green rooms.

3. Do not eat turnips.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never wear yellow shorts.