Zagparknurl is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, uncaring eagle.

Zagparknurl created a down quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zagparknurl, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Zagparknurl, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Zagparknurl's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Zagparknurl's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Do not shave your legs.

5. Never skip near gulls.