Satdudhat is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, charitable hippopotamus.

Satdudhat created matter four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Satdudhat, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Satdudhat, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Satdudhat's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Satdudhat's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Never mention mites.

3. Erect a large tin sculpture of Satdudhat on top of all buildings.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Never look in ponds.