Jatlidweg is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, unthinking goblin.

Jatlidweg created a bottom quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jatlidweg, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Jatlidweg, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Jatlidweg's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Jatlidweg's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never paint your chest blue.

3. Never eat aubergines.

4. Put Jatlidweg first in all things.

5. Never wear trousers.