Ominnabtarp Pibjannulltad is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, confident fly.

Ominnabtarp Pibjannulltad created snails two billion years ago.

If you believe in Ominnabtarp Pibjannulltad, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Ominnabtarp Pibjannulltad, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Ominnabtarp Pibjannulltad's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Ominnabtarp Pibjannulltad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in turquoise rooms.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Never talk about dogs.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Never play with disobedient children.