Geptonksablarnhamshav Badhugdavstipbanwig is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, almighty yak.

Geptonksablarnhamshav Badhugdavstipbanwig created the planet Mars nine million years ago.

If you believe in Geptonksablarnhamshav Badhugdavstipbanwig, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Geptonksablarnhamshav Badhugdavstipbanwig, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Geptonksablarnhamshav Badhugdavstipbanwig's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Geptonksablarnhamshav Badhugdavstipbanwig's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate sharks.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Never go into fawn rooms.

5. Worship no other gods but Geptonksablarnhamshav Badhugdavstipbanwig.