Pogtigfitart is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, witty fairy.

Pogtigfitart created the planet Jupiter two million years ago.

If you believe in Pogtigfitart, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Pogtigfitart, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Pogtigfitart's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Pogtigfitart's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Feed all hungry whales.