Jipruttab is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, idiotic wyrm.

Jipruttab created snails eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jipruttab, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Jipruttab, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Jipruttab's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Jipruttab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat pineapples.

2. Never feed peas to frogs while wearing violet stockings.

3. Do not eat turnips.

4. Do not wear silver on your body.

5. Never think about the weak nuclear force.