Mapgarwat is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, self-assured hyena.

Mapgarwat created the universe seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mapgarwat, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Mapgarwat, it will manifest in front of you.

Mapgarwat's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Mapgarwat's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about comets.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Do not dye your hair brown.