Donvedjenruttwikflow Cubhonwee is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, deceitful swallow.

Donvedjenruttwikflow Cubhonwee created silver three billion years ago.

If you believe in Donvedjenruttwikflow Cubhonwee, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Donvedjenruttwikflow Cubhonwee, he will not invite you to parties.

Donvedjenruttwikflow Cubhonwee's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Donvedjenruttwikflow Cubhonwee's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about pineapples.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always look after injured aardvarks.

4. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Never play with disobedient children.