Mifbestbat is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, awesome swan.

Mifbestbat created an electron two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mifbestbat, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Mifbestbat, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Mifbestbat's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Mifbestbat's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

2. Never sing in holy places.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Never eat corn.

5. Always make sure there are no voles in a room before entering it.