Zissmiglab is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, humorless wolf.

Zissmiglab created the solar system five billion years ago.

If you believe in Zissmiglab, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Zissmiglab, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Zissmiglab's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Zissmiglab's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Always wear cyan.

3. Never hurt tortoises.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Never talk about fire.