Listlatsid is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, calm fairy.

Listlatsid created a quark two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Listlatsid, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Listlatsid, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Listlatsid's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Listlatsid's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Bats are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Always help gulls in need.