Fassisarf is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, moody alligator.

Fassisarf created matter nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fassisarf, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Fassisarf, it will cry a lot.

Fassisarf's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Fassisarf's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick pigs.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.