Quillquatcib is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, thoughtless hippopotamus.

Quillquatcib created water six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quillquatcib, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Quillquatcib, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Quillquatcib's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Quillquatcib's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about ducks.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of silver.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Always stare at clouds.