Pidwonbom is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, dishonest spider.

Pidwonbom created a bottom quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Pidwonbom, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Pidwonbom, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Pidwonbom's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Pidwonbom's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate sharks.

2. Never look at nebulae.

3. Always look after injured snails.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Do not dye your hair blue.