Besscedhogfom is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, overgenerous rat.

Besscedhogfom created the planet Earth five billion years ago.

If you believe in Besscedhogfom, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Besscedhogfom, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Besscedhogfom's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Besscedhogfom's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at moons.

2. Retreat if seven monkeys approach from the east.

3. Never bounce in holy places.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Do not drink water in pink rooms.