Nuttbonknad Nartquatbiss is a god.
He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, unthoughtful mink.
Nuttbonknad Nartquatbiss created a strange quark three quadrillion years ago.
If you believe in Nuttbonknad Nartquatbiss, he will make you immortal.
If you do not believe in Nuttbonknad Nartquatbiss, he will turn you into a puffin.
Nuttbonknad Nartquatbiss' most sacred site is Issigeac in France.
Nuttbonknad Nartquatbiss' Holy Commandments
1. Do not eat corn.
2. Fast once a month.
3. Never feed cucumbers to gulls while wearing brown dresses.
4. Never eat green fruit.
5. Always wear magenta.