Caplagbum is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, competent squid.

Caplagbum created Europe two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Caplagbum, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Caplagbum, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Caplagbum's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Caplagbum's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from yellow great tits for they are unholy.

2. Caplagbum must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Do not wear gray clothing.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Pray towards the south.