Gedlabratzod is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, witty spider.

Gedlabratzod created the solar system seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gedlabratzod, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Gedlabratzod, she will boil you in a big pot.

Gedlabratzod's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Gedlabratzod's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear cyan.

2. Never hurt horses.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never sit in holy places.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.