Tailtannigjanzimfedbedciss is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, humane jaguar.

Tailtannigjanzimfedbedciss created a bottom quark six billion years ago.

If you believe in Tailtannigjanzimfedbedciss, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Tailtannigjanzimfedbedciss, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Tailtannigjanzimfedbedciss' most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Tailtannigjanzimfedbedciss' Holy Commandments

1. Hide from white ducks for they are unholy.

2. Do not kill seals.

3. Tailtannigjanzimfedbedciss loves moths, so they must be honoured.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Never talk about cell theory.