Fumbarndam is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, egotistical beaver.

Fumbarndam created the Sunflower Galaxy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fumbarndam, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Fumbarndam, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Fumbarndam's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Fumbarndam's Holy Commandments

1. Goats are not to be trusted.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Do not speak about cherries.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Run away if five squirrels approach from the north.