Fagmiplist is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, selfish seal.

Fagmiplist created parasitic wasps eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fagmiplist, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Fagmiplist, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Fagmiplist's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Fagmiplist's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat wheat.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Fagmiplist.

4. Never write about cell theory.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.