Artbegjon is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, unthinking cat.

Artbegjon created light eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Artbegjon, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Artbegjon, it will destroy your home planet.

Artbegjon's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Artbegjon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not jump in public.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

4. Badgers are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.