Tigdodhiv is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, duplicitous manatee.

Tigdodhiv created a bottom quark four million years ago.

If you believe in Tigdodhiv, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Tigdodhiv, it will jump up and down on your head.

Tigdodhiv's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Tigdodhiv's Holy Commandments

1. Erect nine gold sculptures of Tigdodhiv on top of important buildings.

2. Do not hurt squirrels.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate seals.

5. Never wear dresses.