Yarpgatmif is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, unsympathetic badger.

Yarpgatmif created a charm quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yarpgatmif, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Yarpgatmif, it will turn you into a goat.

Yarpgatmif's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Yarpgatmif's Holy Commandments

1. Do not bounce in public.

2. Always help sick grasshopers.

3. Do not eat cucumbers.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Do not dye your hair fawn.