Largsakveen Kenxenfigpin is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, intelligent narwhal.

Largsakveen Kenxenfigpin created the Large Magellanic Cloud seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Largsakveen Kenxenfigpin, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Largsakveen Kenxenfigpin, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Largsakveen Kenxenfigpin's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Largsakveen Kenxenfigpin's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never look at stars.

3. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.