Bimcarveen is a god.

She takes the form of a large, egotistical duck.

Bimcarveen created the Andromeda Galaxy five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bimcarveen, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Bimcarveen, she will try to impress you with rainbows.

Bimcarveen's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Bimcarveen's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Pray towards the east.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Bimcarveen.

4. Never sing near mice.

5. Erect three carbon sculptures of Bimcarveen on top of important buildings.