Wikfatbess is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, grumpy mouse.

Wikfatbess created Africa nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wikfatbess, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Wikfatbess, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Wikfatbess' most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Wikfatbess' Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Wikfatbess' priests.

2. Never think ill of sick badgers.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Wikfatbess.

5. Never talk about fire.