Cabingyar is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, awe-inspiring lobster.

Cabingyar created Europe twelve years ago.

If you believe in Cabingyar, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Cabingyar, it will turn you into a rat.

Cabingyar's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Cabingyar's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear shirts.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Never look in ponds.