Honzanzodton is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, idiotic snail.

Honzanzodton created a charm quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Honzanzodton, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Honzanzodton, it will throw large rocks at you.

Honzanzodton's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Honzanzodton's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Honzanzodton five times a day.

2. Never hurt pigs.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Honzanzodton.

4. Never go into purple rooms.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.