Arpkarmad is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, flying hare.

Arpkarmad created tapeworms three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Arpkarmad, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Arpkarmad, he will try to impress you with rainbows.

Arpkarmad's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Arpkarmad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate turtles.

3. Arpkarmad must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.