Honquafdap is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, conceited penguin.

Honquafdap created dark matter seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Honquafdap, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Honquafdap, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Honquafdap's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Honquafdap's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate rats.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Never sit in the presence of aardvarks.

5. Feed all hungry monkeys.