Kiphivnil Minnaklim is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, two-faced unicorn.

Kiphivnil Minnaklim created energy eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Kiphivnil Minnaklim, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Kiphivnil Minnaklim, he will not invite you to parties.

Kiphivnil Minnaklim's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Kiphivnil Minnaklim's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip in the presence of mites.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Erect nine iron sculptures of Kiphivnil Minnaklim on top of important buildings.