Cetnablop is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, humane lobster.

Cetnablop created the planet Jupiter three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cetnablop, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Cetnablop, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Cetnablop's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Cetnablop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Cetnablop's name in vain.

2. Worship no other gods but Cetnablop.

3. Mites are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Never feed limes to eagles while wearing gray dresses.

5. Cetnablop must be the most important thing in your life.