Hogdid Ominxucklarn is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, merciful bear.

Hogdid Ominxucklarn created the planet Saturn seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hogdid Ominxucklarn, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Hogdid Ominxucklarn, it will be very unhappy.

Hogdid Ominxucklarn's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Hogdid Ominxucklarn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Never laugh near sharks.

4. Do not wear gold on your body.

5. Never paint your feet yellow.