Zasstanvil is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, fussy toad.

Zasstanvil created oxygen six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zasstanvil, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Zasstanvil, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Zasstanvil's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Zasstanvil's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Never look at stars.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate snakes.

4. Never hurt hamsters.

5. Hide if six badgers approach from the west.