Pagdamflab is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, conceited gnu.

Pagdamflab created the planet Mars three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pagdamflab, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Pagdamflab, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Pagdamflab's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Pagdamflab's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear yellow shorts.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Do not wear orange clothing.

5. Always wear red.