Tifhunzag is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, wise sheep.

Tifhunzag created the Cigar Galaxy two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tifhunzag, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Tifhunzag, he will manifest in front of you.

Tifhunzag's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Tifhunzag's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about cell theory.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Run away if four swans approach from the south.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Put Tifhunzag first in all things.