Zodbasttapcan is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, dishonourable hippopotamus.

Zodbasttapcan created Africa nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zodbasttapcan, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Zodbasttapcan, she will turn you into a mouse.

Zodbasttapcan's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Zodbasttapcan's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never mention cats.

3. Always wear gray.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.