Yattfligpan is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, irritating slug.

Yattfligpan created a Higgs boson six billion years ago.

If you believe in Yattfligpan, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Yattfligpan, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Yattfligpan's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Yattfligpan's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about planets.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. You must never eat corn.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate foxes.