Rapmegtonk is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, tranquil faun.

Rapmegtonk created the planet Earth nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Rapmegtonk, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Rapmegtonk, he will turn you into a goat.

Rapmegtonk's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Rapmegtonk's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention manatees.

2. Whales are not to be trusted.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Rapmegtonk.

5. Do not run in public.