Stanfutfon is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, compassionate hamster.

Stanfutfon created life six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Stanfutfon, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Stanfutfon, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Stanfutfon's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Stanfutfon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in brown rooms.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always make sure there are no otters in a room before entering it.

4. Always make sure there are no capybaras in a building before entering it.

5. Erect seven carbon sculptures of Stanfutfon on top of important buildings.