Latfebvig is a god.
It takes the form of an extremely fat, passionate guinea pig.
Latfebvig created a quark three billion years ago.
If you believe in Latfebvig, it will grant you immortality.
If you do not believe in Latfebvig, it will turn you into a snail.
Latfebvig's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.
Latfebvig's Holy Commandments
1. Latfebvig must be the most important thing in your life.
2. Fast once a month.
3. Always help sick tapirs.
4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.
5. Never look in ponds.