Ranruttdun is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, unfair duck.

Ranruttdun created matter nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ranruttdun, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Ranruttdun, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Ranruttdun's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Ranruttdun's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Ranruttdun's priests.

2. Always help sick tortoises.

3. Never bounce in the presence of sharks.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Ranruttdun.

5. Never hurt birds.