Cinnurtwan is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, confident owl.

Cinnurtwan created an up quark three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cinnurtwan, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Cinnurtwan, he will torture you forever.

Cinnurtwan's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Cinnurtwan's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt great tits.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Cinnurtwan.

3. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Do not wear gold on your body.