Zag is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, generous dragon.

Zag created energy four billion years ago.

If you believe in Zag, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Zag, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Zag's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Zag's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about nebulae.

2. Do not eat limes.

3. Never mention nematodes.

4. Zag loves capybaras, so they must be respected.

5. Always take life seriously.