Hatmetvon is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, compassionate narwhal.

Hatmetvon created a down quark seven million years ago.

If you believe in Hatmetvon, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Hatmetvon, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Hatmetvon's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Hatmetvon's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Hatmetvon.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. You must pray to Hatmetvon seven times a day.

5. Never jump in holy places.